Tour of Insanity: A Manifesto for Better Home Design

Description

Have you ever walked around your house wondering WHY this was installed that way or WHY there is orange shag carpet in the kitchen? Maybe you wondered WHY there has to be a front yard or WHY do pests keep getting into your home? We provide a comedic look at the WHY and some insight on what should be.

This book provides a tour of the insanity of past, present, and future home design highlighting the tragic comedy of why things are the way they are and what could be done differently to elevate home design. We address the absurd notions of shag carpeting in bathrooms and what led to their demise as well as how to shore up your home from pesty invaders. Tour of Insanity is designed to spark conversations and provide comic relief while introducing solutions.  

If you want serious, mapped out architectural and home decor enlightenment - walk away, this book isn't for you. We provide odd facts, bizarre history, and viable solutions that in most cases are beyond our control. After reading, you will walk away with interesting stories and whimsical knowledge that is great for warming up dinner conversations, but first and foremost, you will smile.

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About the Author

Author Name : Kelly Mitchell

     I am a country girl who escaped to the big city of Las Vegas. In my adventures, I have found my heart never left the country. My ambition will always be my best and worst attribute. My background is a checkered field of experience carnage. My restless soul never wants to be known as one thing or settle into one 'niche', so I often immerse myself in research. When I wake from my daze, I have some certificate or degree. This is the curse of the forever learner. My taste for satire and dark sense of humor are prominent in my work. I love writing SciFi, opinions, erotica, nonfiction, poetry, and fiction works. My geek is often coming untucked when I write my stories. I am, above all, a storyteller.

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Countless things put together make us who we are

Perhaps what we’ve learned or things seen near and far

True or false learned from numerous varied sources

Or perhaps something seen travelling many courses

 

It has been my great pleasure to see some special lands

Majestic mountain vistas, Alberta’s haunting badlands

The vastness of the prairie with horizon never reached

The power of the ocean from a shell strewn beach

 

I’ve crossed giant rivers, walked beside the babbling brook

Seen the best and worst of nature seldom pictured in a book

The crags of mountain passes, topped by winter’s sparkling load

Miles and miles of wheat the sun and rain has turned to gold.

 

Acres and acres of deep green peas, topped by the pink of bloom.

Offset in midst of summer with bright yellow canola bloom

A patch-work quilt from nature and the work of many hands

Laid out in squares and diamonds across a great productive land.

 

The history of Bedford Basin, Louisbourg, Queenston Heights

Twenty four hours of daylight, mysterious northern lights

Beaver pelts to England to make all kinds of hats

And each spring the best of sugar boiled from Maple sap.

 

A strong beautiful stallion, head high, nostrils flared,

Eyes full of fire and danger as he guards his heard of mares

Several hundred cattle grazing the luscious grass

Or bedded in the shade to let the hot day pass.

 

Hundreds of pictures we catalogue as we go passing by

Let the good ones erase the bad, or at least let them try

Some of it we saw and some of it we learned.

Some good and some bad but somehow always earned.

 

There’s always strife and woe, you don’t need to hunt it up

Forget it, let it lay. You know there’s the rub

You may hate this or that but it’s all part of the way

You became who you are; what you are today.

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